The Foorce

Among the many reasons for falling off of the blog wagon lately was finding out (the hard way) that Ian is seriously allergic to dairy and soy. As in break out the epi pen, hives/vomiting/breathing trouble allergic. And because he’s not allowed near it, neither am I. I am strongly pro-nursing, but this new dairy/soy-free diet has really tested my limits (good thing my limits have been stretched out so much already).

So even though it may appear so, the following conversation was not exaggerated in my mind due to dairy-deprivation. My kids just live to torture me.

————————————-

We stopped at a deli for sandwiches on the way to the playground. Since many types of bread are made with soy (who knew), I opted for a peach and a diet coke, with plans to gorge myself on cashews as soon as we got home.

James: Want a chip?

Me: Thanks, but I can’t.

James: Yeah, they’re not very healthy.

Me: Well, yes, but they’re also sour cream and onion – see on the back, they have milk. I can’t have milk.

James: Oh, yeah. You can’t eat any food, right?

Me: Ha, not really.

James: None of our delicious kid food.

Me: Nope.

(5 minutes later)

James: Thanks for these delicious chips, Mom.

Me: You’re welcome.

James: Want a chip? They are so good.

Margaret: She can’t – those chips are full of milk!

James: Oh right, that’s too bad you can’t have milk because these chips are really delicious. We can have milk, right Mom?

Me: Yep.

James: Margaret, want a milk chip?

Margaret: I can. Mom can’t. I’ll have a chip (munches). Yeah, these are sooooo gooood.

Me: Really, guys?

James: It’s too bad you can’t eat any food, Mom.

Me: Well, I have a delicious peach.

Margaret (holds up peach): Me, too. And milk chips.

Me: They’re actually sour cream and onion.

Margaret: And a sandwich.

James: Me too.

Me: Looks good.

James: What else are you going to eat, Mom?

Me: I’ll eat when we get home.

(5 minutes later, at the playground)

James: Look, the ice cream truck is here!

Margaret: Can we get ice cream later?

Me: Probably not today.

James: Awww, why not?

Me: We’ve had enough treats for one day.

Margaret: But we can have some.

Me: Not today.

Margaret: We won’t put it near Ian.

Me: That’s nice, but that’s not why you can’t have some. (It’s really because I can’t lick the cones clean all afternoon)

James: We won’t let you or Ian near our ice cream.

Me: Not. Today. Go play – we’re at a playground, not an ice cream store!

Expecting more complaints, I was happy to see James and Margaret give up quickly and head for the swings… 

Margaret: Poor Mom can’t have ice cream.

James: Yeah, poor mom.

Margaret: Maybe next time, right James?

James: Maybe next time we can bring Dad.